Growing up we absolutely did not talk about masturbation. It was shameful and wrong. The surgeon general, Dr Joycelyn Elders was promptly fired when she said that masturbation was healthy, normal, and should be taught in school. No one questioned Clinton getting rid of her — of course she had to be fired!
So let’s talk about masturbation.
First of all, what a beautiful even potentially sacred act of self love. I don’t always treat it like that of course. Quite often it is just a simple body comfort and I do it watching porn. But I also have a conscious masturbation practice. I think everyone should.
Most people are under the mistaken notion that male ejaculation and orgasm are inseparable. This turns out to not be true. It is absolutely possible for men to have mind blowing, screaming orgasms without ejaculation. I regularly do. How? I read a book by Manta Chia about gaining control over our energy flows. Sounds a bit woo woo right? But it is very, very real. It took a lot of practice and many, many failed attempts, but what enjoyable practice! The first step is to get really present to the different stages of arousal and recognize when I’m just at the very, very brink of orgasm. Then I do two things. I contract my kegels to hold off the spurt, but I also switch my internal energy flow. One interesting side effect is that because I’m so attuned now to the different stages of arousal, I can also bring my lover to the very edge of orgasm and have her coast there for a long time. It helps to deepen and prolong the orgasm when it finally comes. And the same for me. It used to be that when I orgasmed it was a brief intense squirt that was kind of disappointing. Now my orgasms are so much better. I’m astonished how many men still have not taken this practice on. Many have never even heard of this.
This is all very nice you might be thinking, but why write about it here? Because when I talk about working with spirit I am not talking about some abstract entity that likes to throw thunderbolts from time to time. I’m talking about something that lives in our body right now. It is right there in every breath, and in every bite of food we take. It is right there when hold our child, or feel that familiar awful dread in our belly. It is right there. Mantak Chia taught me to really feel the energy flows in my body and learn to consciously control them. Energy workers when they work with me almost immediately realize, “Oh! — you are running kundalini energy right?”. Yes, that is exactly what I’m doing. When I allow it, I am having a kundalini awakening. For me I experience that as a body sense of the divine that is our everything.